On My Way to Finding God's Calling

Last week was the launch of a beautiful book written by a gutsy, brave, intelligent woman whom God has gifted with more than just a poetic style. She has a heart that follows hard after her Saviour and a life that is devoted to speaking love and life into the church, Christ's bride. She speaks into the need to bring healing to every place in the world that needs the hands and feet of Jesus. With a captivating title and a bright yellow cover, the inside holds the heart of a Saviour whose story has no gender.

Growing up watching my mom teach Sunday School, organize church dinners, oversee Vacation Bible School and serve on pulpit committees, I was still aware that this was all part of complimenting my dad in his roles as deacon or Sunday School superintendent. At the same time she raised four boys and a girl, kept up with the house and in our teen years was a leader for Bible Study Fellowship. As a woman she “had her place'.

To be clear, this was comfortable for my mom. She was able to serve in her full capacity in these positions, love my dad deeply and have an intimate relationship with her Saviour. She had no desire to preach or work outside the home. She was literally and figuratively a 50s housewife.

She was content there.

Even as a young girl I began to believe that my goal in life was to find a man to fall in love with. One who I would compliment, we would fit together like two pieces of a puzzle and ride off into the sunset together. As a teen, having a boyfriend was the validation I searched for over and over. When you believe that something or someone will make your life have meaning it becomes so very hard to do anything else. When everything weighs on who you are to someone else, that is where you focus. That is the path you pursue.

During my first year at a Baptist college there was an understanding that men were there for a bachelor's (there is a certain irony in that) and the women were pursuing their "MRS" degree.
I wanted to serve in the church so my plan was to study Christian Education. That was squelched when I was told they didn't allow women into that major. However, I could major in Religion with a minor in Education. After all, women could become teachers (which includes teaching young men, just not older men). I still wasn't given hope to have a future as a Christian Education director because they don't hire women to do that. (A year later they changed the rules. A friend of mine graduated with a Christian Ed degree.)

In the years that followed, instead of pursuing career goals, I pursued the one thing in life that I had been taught would make me whole. Even if it meant a relationship with an abusive person, it was better to be in a bad relationship than none. After all, that was what I was created for, right?

Eventually I found my way back to a purer faith. Through many trials I learned that the only relationship I was truly called to was the one I was created for and that was with my Creator. Everything else would become extra. A husband and children would be blessings, not goals to achieve.

My daily desire should be to find my wholeness in Him, not in another human. Our relationships with each other should be to speak His life to each person, remembering that He created them as well. When we get caught up in the details of marital status or gender we short change the work of the Holy Spirit in the lives of those who need us.

This morning I woke up thinking of several women who I know live their lives in pursuit of Jesus. Some are divorced, a few never married, some widowed and others married. Their value isn't in their status. One is not less because of where she has been. They are all deeply loved because God created them for a relationship with Him yet the attitudes of so many in the church would diminish those women. Jesus doesn't diminish, He heals the hearts of His people even as they fight for a place to serve. Even as they are dismissed because of their gender. If we follow Jesus' example we will find ourselves sharing water at the well instead of whispering behind someone's back. We will allow women to be like Mary who sat at the feet of her Rabbi in a culture where women stayed in the kitchen. Women “with an issue” won't have to be embarrassed to seek His healing but will be ushered into His presence with hope.

To me it is no accident that we now serve at a church that espouses these same beliefs. Jesus tells us that the greatest commandment is to love God with all of our heart, soul, mind and strength. He tells us that the second is like it and that is to love our neighbor as ourselves. He doesn't detract from it by differentiating or dividing us up in class or status. In fact when He elaborates on what a neighbor is, He uses a parable that tells how religious folks passed by a wounded man and it was one who was considered an enemy who stopped to help.

As church leaders we are called to equip the saints. That would be all saints, not just married saints, parental saints, old saints or male saints. All means all. In that, no one is more worthy to serve than any other. There are souls waiting to be touched, to be fed, to be clothed, to have their thirst quenched or to be healed.

I see a movement coming and stirring side by side with those who seek the heart of Jesus to release us to love deeper. The walls are crumbling that were built out of fear and ignorance. They did not keep us safe. Instead, they held us back from discovering our God given purpose.

When they come down, my hope is that we will be able to see Christ, standing here in our midst. Let us draw near to Him as we love one another. As we make a way for our brothers and sisters to reach into this world without impediment. In humility, let us see one another as more important than ourselves.

Philippians 2:1 “Therefore if there is any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and mercy, 2 fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind. 3 Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. 4 Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. 5 Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus”.

In August I reviewed the book, “Jesus Feminist: An Invitation to Revisit the Bible's View of Women”. It was released last week and I couldn't be happier for Sarah Bessey but even more I am anxious for every one to take the time to read her words. To know better how the Bible speaks of God's love for me has released my heart from the walls created decades ago. I am beginning to understand that my giftings aren't left in the kitchen sink to soak off last night's dinner but are woven through the dailies as well as the extraordinary moments. Christa Pitcairn, a local pastor preached the sermon, “Singled Out in A Couple's World”. (I wrote about it here.) In it she asked, “When you know you are called to a platform ministry but no one has provided that place, are you willing to preach from the street corner?”

This is me, stepping onto my street corner, bring released and drenched in the Saviour's love. As I lean in and love my Creator and I learn to love others without man made boundaries, I am finding a joy unspeakable. As I experience what it means to live in His grace, as I allow it to pour through me to others, I am finding my freedom.
To be sure, Mom wanted me to be a loving wife and mother. Even deeper than that her desire was for me to find peace in the arms of our Saviour. Shouldn't that be our hope for all of His creation?

Always,

Hope

PS: This wasn't meant as another review or an advertisement for "Jesus Feminist" but what is written there was a catalyst and balm for this part of my journey.
You can purchase it here 

When We Reclaim the Gift of Women (A Book Review)

I'm well aware that the title of this book will raise some eyebrows. I'll admit it took me off guard at first too. Thankfully, knowing who wrote it, I knew what was inside was worth getting past my own preconceived notions of the word "feminist". When I opened it up I unearthed treasures of grace, beauty and substance. This went far beyond expectations into a place in my soul that surprised even me. It was a place of strengthening my own faith that went beyond my own beliefs.

The writing in this book had the prose Sarah's readers have come to know. It's full of the raw, honest, gutsy stories of a woman who has an intimate relationship with her Saviour. She speaks of Jesus with a love that only comes from knowing Him intimately. In this book, Sarah reclaims the worth that our Creator instilled in all women. What my Lord sees in me. How much He loves me as much as any other human He created.

Sarah weaves her own stories throughout with the Scriptures we know. She kindly challenges the world's view of feminism. Just as Jesus defended Mary while she sat at His feet, we are challenged to rethink rules we've made that contradict the message of His love for us.

Jesus Feminist: An Invitation to Revisit the Bible's View of Women is an inspiring piece that will move, rejuvenate and challenge readers to sink deeper into knowing Christ. My hope is that it will galvanize Christ's followers as we understand the undeniable worth of women and the purpose God has placed in each of us.

You can order Jesus Feminist here!

Always,

Hope

PS: I recently wrote more about being a Jesus Feminist here.

In Extending Grace

If there is one thing I've learned about the internet it is that it takes very little to raise someone's hackles. The slightest misstep in wording can cause a storm of words that make a Kansas tornado seem tame.
A lovely woman who has weathered many of life's storms openly in her writings found herself the battening down the hatches this week. The piece she wrote for Prodigal Magazine challenging feminist ideologies by encouraging servant hood in marriage set off an F-4. Those who have followed or interacted with her took a gentle approach with her words. Others took great exception to such an extreme their comments were filled with veiled (some not so veiled) accusations of a permissive attitude towards abuse. To say it got out of hand would be a gross understatement.
Whether or not this writer used an unfortunate analogy or just ticked off those who are fighting their cause doesn't matter. So many got mad so fast that what was worth saving became completely overlooked. The point she was making about having the heart of Christ, living out grace and serving each other just slid through unnoticed. That to me was the saddest thing about it all. Everyone fighting so loudly over the words that we missed her heart.
I hope I didn't.
You see, what I heard was, serving each other isn't dependent on the response of the one you are blessing. Grace demands that we give without expecting anything in return. It is about how our heart kneels down to wash feet no matter how dirty the person's feet are. Jesus didn't wash the feet of the clean, He washed those who have mucked through the dirt of life. He didn't wait until they had a good attitude, He served anyway.
This morning I was struck by a post published by Everyone Matters. It is one person's story of giving money to a family with cardboard signs. In biblical days we would call them beggars. Now we turn the other way, ignore them or even worse we cast judgement on how they ended up there. I was moved by the author's words when she said "Many people might say or think that I'm a fool for giving them money because for all I know it might be a scam. True, it may be a scam and it may not be. But I don't think I could be at peace with myself if I knew that I could have helped that family and chose not to."
This my friends is grace. This is giving without receiving. There was no expectation on this family to prove they needed money or that they would spend it wisely. We can only be responsible for what we choose to do with what we are given.
That's what I heard from the heart of my sister, submission to her husband in a biblical sense. Although we are to submit to one another, it isn't true submission to make someone obey you. To demand that they submit to you as well is conditional love. If you require their behavior be worthy of submission first, you aren't truly submitting, you are controlling.
Jesus washed our feet. 
Jesus died before we followed Him.
Jesus sacrificed His life so we could be reconciled to Him and each other.
He never demanded us to follow but doesn't it make sense the if we don't follow Him, we can't really be with Him? My husband doesn't demand that I follow him but He leads. With that leadership he listens to my voice. He hears my concerns. He trusts my heart. Through my submission to him our relationship is free to flourish. Ephesians 5:21 says "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord." You see, even though it says that we should submit to each other, my own responsibility is found in verse 22. That was written to me.
Today we are preparing for a women's event that I oversee every other month. My husband has assembled the cooking team, spent yesterday cleaning the area from the Easter play and tonight will help with whatever is needed to support the ministry I have been given. It his an act of service to me. It is still a dance where we are learning the steps but the music we listen to is the same. 
It is the music of grace.

Always,



Hope

Thankfulness Journal - Day 7 - God's Presence in My Life

Photo Credit: A Shared Lens 

Orange County California was an exciting place to grow up during the late 60s and early 70's. Everything around us was changing, even the way we did church.

I experienced firsthand the beginning of the Jesus movement. My parents were involved with teen ministry which meant I had the privilege of seeing it all up close. I grew up singing the songs that changed "church music". As a teen we would drive to Saturday night Maranatha concerts in Costa Mesa. Several years later my new husband and I attended both Downey and the original Calvary Chapel. We spent our first eighteen years of marriage attending or affiliated with them in some way or another. We even planted a church in a small community just east of here around 2001.

Pastor Chuck Smith and his wife Kay were well known for being committed to teaching God's Word. What helped it grow is that they loved people where they were at. In my early days of church it was unheard of for women to wear pants to church and men wearing jeans was just as frowned upon. Attending church down the freeway from Costa Mesa, it didn't take long for the influence to reach us. Eventually it led to women wearing pants in the evening services and in the hot summer you might even see some wearing shorts. Church gatherings became less about the clothing and more about making disciples.

When the new building in Costa Mesa opened, a few elders in the church became concerned about the carpet. This "all are welcome" approach brought scores of young people in from the streets, many barefoot which meant the carpet became filthy. Pastor Chuck came in one day to find a box of flip flops one of the elders had purchased by the door in the sanctuary to make sure that no one got the carpets dirty. Chuck was heard saying that he would yank up the carpets before he would tell people what to wear to church. As the story goes, the box of shoes disappeared before the next service started.

The popularity of the Christian faith, at that time in our history wasn't about telling people how to act.  Politics played no role in fact, it was about bringing a Savior to a hungry world. The message that changed lives spoke into brokenness and brought healing focused on the heart of a person. It brought hope to a world filled with turmoil, war and uncertainties. Hope didn't come from showing people where they were wrong. It grew out of leading people to what was good and pure and right.

I'm thankful for God's presence in my life every day. When our nation is divided, I find comfort in Him. When the storms rage around me, the Holy Spirit whisper to my heart, "Peace, be still".

Where do you go to experience God's presence in your life? Have you found a way to experience peace in the storm?

Always,

Hope

Eshet chayil - A Woman of Valor Tribute to Rachel Held Evans

Do you remember at the end of high school when everyone signed your yearbook? There always seemed to be that random guy who got ahold of your book to write, "I didn't know you very well but you seem like a really cool person. Have a bitchin' summer!"

I don't really want to be "that guy".

Almost two weeks ago I was invited to write a piece to honor Rachel Held Evans as a woman of valor. Her friends orchestrated an online soirée, gathering to give her honor and blessings. This past Tuesday was the release of her book "A Year of Biblical Womanhood". I didn't open my invitation until Tuesday, the day it was due. Here I am, fashionably late as usual. (I hope I don't get marked down for being tardy!) I'm afraid I have a disadvantage from my peers in that I do not know Rachel as well as they do. Still, I felt moved to speak into her life.

As the wife of an apologist I tend to be skeptical about theology so "faith" blogs make me nervous. When I first discovered the writings of RHE, I'll admit it, I was overwhelmed. The topics she dares to tackle, the areas  explored and those whom she dares to question are not for the faint of heart. This woman puts on hip high waders to walk into the deepest issues for a closer look. In her bravery, she takes her readers with her in an exploration of humanity and faith.

In the month leading up to the release of Rachel's book, I have observed this brave, intelligent woman handle herself with utmost grace. Even before this "assignment" I began researching AYOBW. Like any good apologist's wife, you don't study what other's say about who you're studying, you listen (or read) their own words.

From her own writing: "I believe that all Scripture is inspired by God and useful for teaching, challenging, correcting, and training in righteousness, so that the people of God are equipped for good works. I acknowledge and submit to the authority of Scripture, even though I often wrestle with it, even though it frustrates and confuses me at times."  This was what I had been hoping to find.

Two weeks ago, my Twitter feed was full of activity leading up to an interview on The Today Show. I was led to believe that topic was the controversy around a chain of stores that wouldn't carry her book. As I watched her on live television, next to her husband, I saw a woman who wanted nothing more than to share her heart, her God and her life with others. Nothing shocking, nothing sensational and frankly, nothing to worry about.

There are two kinds of popular girls at school. There are those who draw attention to themselves in their own exclusive group who get to the top by walking over others. Then there are those you will always remember as a kind leader who made everyone feel welcome. She was as nice to her best friends as she was to the new kid in town. Rachel, I have seen the way you come alongside other writers, promoting their ideas, listening to their hearts and cheering them on. You have opened your online home to hear the voices we need to hear.

Eshet chayil! Woman of Valor!

I raise my Saturday morning coffee to toast you! Thank you for making the new girl in town feel welcomed. This writer who isn't quite as eloquent, polished or young is comfortable in your tent. I'm prepared to sink into the overstuffed couch in front of the warm fire to wrestle through the questions of our faith. You have echoed my heart cries to be gracious and filled to overflowing with love for my God and for each other. 

Always,


Hope

50 Days to 50 - Light Burdens

Day 11

Then Jesus said,
“Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens,
and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you,
because I am humble and gentle at heart,
and you will find rest for your souls.
For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”

MATTHEW 11:29-30

Let's face it, as the parent of a child with multiple medical needs, there is plenty in my life that can feel like a burden. Things that weigh on me seem heavier on days when The Princess isn't feeling well but they can be just as tough when I'm the one who is tired. Ordering medical supplies, formulas or gtube equipment, keeping on top of educational services as well as home services (respite, equipment and home remodels) can crowd my already weary brain. So when it comes to trying to juggle emotional and spiritual burdens, I find myself spent. When my heart is so very heavy for those who are hurting, when I myself am feeling betrayed or misunderstood, I can stand on the the words of my Saviour.

Sitting at His feet I find peace.

Soaking in His Word I find joy.

Standing on His promises I find hope.

His yoke is light. If what I am carrying is too heavy, it isn't mine to take on.

Always,

Hope

(NOTE: This is my Jubilee year. Scripture speaks of this year as a time for restoration and debts to be cancelled. I see it as a time to reflect and to count my blessings. Knowing how precious life is and how miraculous it is, I want to write about His goodness.)

50 Days to 50 - A Refuge

Day 5

When darkness casts a shadow on my soul,

when it presses through to the edges of my heart,

I find myself weary, desperate, seeking rest.

Sometimes the ache comes from life's turns

and with those there is a sense of acceptance.

The knowledge that sometimes things "just happen"

can in itself be a form a comfort when human hands

cannot turn the wheels of circumstance, we find resolve.

Then there are those times when the cruelty of others,

selfishness, hate, greed and insecurities rain down

into our lives and threaten to crush us under the weight.

Even in those times, I am found by His goodness,

surrounded by His faithfulness,
saved by His infinite love for me.

The grace He extends for me,
He gives in abundance so I may

extend it to those who He calls my enemies.

The times I feel bombarded and in my weakness

He becomes my refuge and strength.

Psalm 139: 7-12 (NKJV)

"7 Where can I go from Your Spirit?

Or where can I flee from Your presence?

8 If I ascend into heaven, You are there;

If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there.

9 If I take the wings of the morning,

And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,

10 Even there Your hand shall lead me,

And Your right hand shall hold me.

11 If I say, “Surely the darkness shall fall[a] on me,”

Even the night shall be light about me;

12 Indeed, the darkness shall not hide from You,

But the night shines as the day;

The darkness and the light are both alike to You."

Always,

Hope

(NOTE: This is my Jubilee year. Scripture speaks of this year as a time for restoration and debts to be cancelled. I see it as a time to reflect and to count my blessings. Knowing how precious life is and how miraculous it is, I want to write about His goodness.)

The Cross Through the Eyes of a Mother

During this Holy Week, I can't help but reflect on the most precious gift ever given to humankind, the gift of life. This gift is the most priceless as well. It took enormous sacrifice, we as Christ followers know this. We have heard the story for years told in so many ways that we often get immune to the depth and the price that was paid.
Our church body is in the fourth year of presenting the story called "The Passover Lamb". It is a beautiful portrayal of Jesus during the last days of Holy Week and Passover. A few months ago I was asked to portray Mother Mary and I accepted. During the first rehearsal of the crucifixion scene, the director gave me a picture of how she wanted this part to come across. The horror that Mary saw when she looked upon her son hanging from a cross, beaten, bloody, dying and being mocked by the crowds that surrounded her was to be conveyed.
As I kneel at the foot of the cross during each performance, I see a very small glimpse of what Mary must have seen. It is chilling. My ears tune in to the jeering of the crowd. The voices of the same people who earlier in the week would have been shouting, "Hosanna", "Blessed is He who comes in the name of the Lord"! After He dies, we are left alone, the only sound you hear is the wailing of His friends. As He is carried away by the guards, another wave of grief sweeps through and the reality of His sacrifice sets into another layer of my soul. Then there is a time of hollow mourning. Where numbness and grief intersect. There is no more energy for wailing, only empty sadness.
Then it happens, as it did in reality, the triumph of life over death. The stone rolls away to reveal a risen Saviour. Our God who came in the flesh to pay for what I could not, emerges from the tomb.
The hope that He brought with Him on that day is my constant companion. It has carried me as I am sure it carried Mary on the dark day so long ago. We know the accounts of what she saw on the day He died, we can imagine the joy when He rose but today represents the in between. Today, on the day in between, the confusion, the suffering, the sadness she walked through on that day. Although she knew what He had taught, she also knew that man has freewill and perhaps it was freewill that murdered her Son.
Today, during the "in between", as I prepare to celebrate His resurrection, I will contemplate the heart of a mother whose pain was real. A woman who willingly accepted what it meant to serve God with everything. She never once turned from her commitment and continued to trust in her God, even in the middle of the unimaginable. The God who asks us to trust Him with everything we have as well.

Have a blessed Resurrection Weekend!


Always,


Hope

Doing the Most Important Things First

When Jesus was asked one day what the greatest commandment was, he replied, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’There is no commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12:30,31 NKJV)
While reading this, I was struck by the simplicity of what Christ Followers have been called to do in contrast to how so many think we should live. Many of us are so caught up following the law and in the obedience of those around us that we can't focus on love. Then there are those who are caught up in our own obedience, our own service. We quickly forget what Christ really came to do. Christ came to reconcile us to Himself and to each other. So He asks us to do two things, love Him and love one another.
God is love! He wants us to love Him because in loving Him we find the freedom to love others. I'm not talking about the feeling of love, I'm talking about the action of love. The choice of love. Sometimes the pain of love. The love He gives us which is unconditional. A love not based on performance or on perceived worth.
He loves us wholly and completely and all He asks of us is to love Him back. Anything that we do for Him should be from the outpouring of our love for Him, not out of obligation (we can never pay Him back). It isn't about what we do it is solely about who we are. If everything we do is an overflow of the love we demonstrate for Him we will be filled with a peace and a purpose like no other.
My friend, you are loved. You are an immeasurable treasure and nothing you do can change that. Nothing anyone else says about you or does to you will change the love of your Creator. You are significant. Knowing that should allow you to see others in the same light. Would your responses to those who hurt you be different if you just remembered, "Jesus died for them too"? Are you able to love your neighbor in the way God commands you to? The more we spend time in His presence, loving Him, the more we began to know His love for us.


Always,


Hope

Rain, Clouds and Dreary Seasons

There is no eloquent way to say it, the weather this year is strange. Its mid June and we haven't hit 80 once. Yes, I live in the Pacific Northwest, yes it rains here but trust me, not this much at this time of year. We even live in a section that is sometimes referred to as the banana belt of the Northwest but you wouldn't know it if you just showed up in the past few weeks. It has been cold, wet and stormy for a long time. In the past I have written about how I welcome clouds into my life. I really do, in moderation enjoy storms, rain and even a cold day, but in moderation. Always in moderation. This year it seems as if the time for moderation has past. We all seem to be waiting for the clouds to pass and the warmth to once again brighten our days.
As I was thinking about this today, a thought struck me. We all have times and seasons in our lives that are more dreary than others. Some seasons of life have literal and figurative storms that come crashing in and pass. Others seem to just hang around like a never ending winter. Some last days, some years and some decades. So in the lives of those who seem to have never ending storms, getting through is a matter of finding the hope that (as my Mom always said) "This too shall pass".
So how have I faced this very long dull season? On my better days I continue to hope that the Summer will eventually come. We will gather for "Music on the Half Shell", we will cruise in "Graffiti Night", ride our bikes, attend the county fair and visit the Happiest Place on Earth before the school year returns. I also surround myself with those who lift my spirits. Family and dear friends (some new, some who have weathered many seasons with us) walk along side me through the gray days. They add color and add contrast to my life. They make me laugh, smile, dream and they give hope.
Jesus Christ does that in my spiritual life. When it gets dark for a long time, when the pain of loss chills me through, I turn to Him. The only one who can really walk me through, giving me hope for a brighter day and a warmer season. That is the only hope I can bring to those who are living in the darkest, longest winters of their lives. Like the song says, "Sometimes He calms the storms, sometimes He calms His child." In that I have hope.


Always,
Hope

What Is Holding You Back?

On Sunday, during another wonderful service, there were several people who chose to have prayer for various needs in their lives. While praying the Pastor asked God to release people from their chains or in other words from those things that were keeping them bound up and unable to move forward. This brought on a beautiful time of release and the ability for many to move forward in their lives. No longer would they need to feel held back or frozen in a place of no movement.
This morning, during my own time of prayer and reflection I was struck by something that excited me so much I had to interrupt the Coffee Guy to tell him about it! I really believe this could be one of those life changing moments and I wasn't going to enter it quietly.
As long as I can remember, I have had a love/hate relationship with food. I love it when I want comfort and hate it when it makes me feel out of control. I am one of those girls that could more easily name the very few diets I have not been on as opposed to naming everything I have tried. Its one of the culprits I have blamed when I didn't fit in (literally) yet I have come to know it so intimately that there isn't a dish on this earth that I wouldn't be willing to try and prepare. Food was my friend when I was lonely, my target when I was angry and still there to celebrate the big events of my life! So of course, food must be to blame for so many of the ills in my life, right?
Recently I have been pondering this relationship and have been frustrated to find the answer so elusive. I mean really, everybody seems to have a angle. From cutting out certain foods to how many times a day you eat to writing down everything you eat. We count calories, fat grams and water intake. I have done all that and more! So why can't I get a grip?
While studying Acts this morning, in Chapter 15, Paul and Barnabas were confronted with another group of men teaching about the need for circumcision. It struck me that so many of us are doing the same thing! Circumcision is an act of the flesh, part of the law and an act of cutting away the flesh. I had become part of this argument. I found myself a couple of weeks ago convinced that its not about what we do with our flesh but its our hearts that need to be changed. Sure, our actions will follow but until our hearts are changed, its jut an outward act of the law.
As I read further, I came upon the place where Paul and Silas were imprisoned in Acts 16:25-30 they sang hymns. As they sang, an earthquake shook the entire prison, the doors flew open and their chains fell off. This is where it really hit me. They were busy singing and praising the Lord when they found the sweet release of their chains falling off. They weren't busy examining their chains to see what they were made of or how strong they were. They didn't sit around discussing how they got on there or the unfairness of their situation. They praised their Lord! They concentrated on praising God while in their chains. They continued to seek intimacy with Him instead of excuses to resist intimacy!
My chains are not food. Food has been covering my chains! When I gave up food for exercise, then it was exercise that covered my chains. When I followed the laws of "diet", I was shackled to the law. As I shopped for the perfect clothes, car or mate, those things covered my chains. When I set out to be the perfect wife and mother, those things distracted me from my real chains as well. These things have been diverting my focus from the real bondage all along! The real bondage is going to be different for everyone and I'm still seeking God to figure out mine. Most likely I will find some pride, lack of faith or something else that keeps me from truly being intimate with God. Whatever it is, Romans 8:1-15 tells me to walk in the Spirit. Its a lack of trusting Him and turning to whatever I have considered my chains to be that has kept me from the freedom He intends for me to have!
Today is a day that I am celebrating freedom! After seeking Him, asking for wisdom and having prayers of revelation spoken in my behalf, He is revealing to me that it is time to step forward. Moving away from the old and facing a new day! I can almost audibly hear the chains falling off of my mind and heart.
What are you seeking to be free from today? Do you really want to keep carrying those chains around? Isn't it about time you seek the only one who can make you truly free?

Always,

Hope

Distractions

I have mentioned before how much my Mom loved the Word of God. She loved to read it, soak it in and even teach it. (She was a part of Bible Study Fellowship International for twenty years or more.) She also didn't just study it, she practiced it.

I often wonder if it would be the same now. Would she have the time or with all of today's distractions, would it be more difficult with cell phones, cable/satellite  TV, internet and all of the activities that pull us in different directions. Then I remember, she raised five children, four rowdy boys and one perfectly well behaved daughter (ahem). Actually, I'm convinced that the daughter gave her more prayer callouses on her knees than the four boys combined but that wasn't until we were in adulthood but that is a whole series of posts for another time. The fact is, she took the time and made it a priority.

I remember her telling the story about how she couldn't find time to finish her homework every week. No matter how much she tried to schedule it in, she wasn't getting it done. She even prayed to find the time. She began waking up in the middle of the night. The first few times it happened, she would lay there in frustration, trying to get back to sleep. After a few nights of this it hit her, she had been asking for time and there it was. She began to go into a small room, quietly read and study. For several days she would wake up at around 3 a.m. and made it her routine until finally she was able to find a time during the day. The a.m. wake up calls stopped and she found her niche.

Sitting down, just to be quiet, to listen to God and to soak in His Word can be much harder some days than others. Its not even just the above mentioned things or the fact that its so tempting to check messages every morning. Social networking sites have waylaid me from reading or writing on more than one occasion lately but some mornings, its just the clutter of thoughts in my mind that keep me from hearing what I need to hear. I'll start to read about one thing while a thought pops up reminding me of the past or something on my "to do" list. Like "Dug" in the Disney movie UP!, I can be mid thought and yell "Squirrel!" as my head whips around in a different direction.

I am convinced that we need to make ourselves be quiet. No TV, no radio, no internet, no outside input but just surround ourselves with quiet at least once a day. The "busy"ness crowds into our minds and clutters our hearts with things that need to be thrown out or at least recycled into something positive. We need to empty ourselves and allow our Creator to refill us daily so we can know His heart. We can find peace and direction when we know Him. We can start small and as we cut out distractions we can better see our destiny.

Where will you carve out a place to seek peace today? When will you make time to just sit and listen to what is being spoken into your heart? Like making time for your favorite show or activity, will you make time to rest your mind and fill your soul?

Always,

Hope

Forgive who?

My Mom's bible is a treasure to me. It is well used and when I find passages underlined I am drawn in. Yesterday, while reading Luke 6 my eyes caught three highlighted paragraphs. Knowing that I was following the previous post this couldn't be an accident. I was exactly where I needed to be.

The passage begins at verse 27   “But I say to you who hear: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, ²⁸ bless those who curse you, and pray for those who spitefully use you." (Luke 6:27-28, New King James Version) The NIV says "mistreat you".

I honestly believe that many of us resist forgiveness because we would be required to do the above. He tells us to do it any way. He doesn't single out Christ followers but clearly, those of us who are truly following Him are going to live by His teachings.

So what about this thing we call forgiveness? Why are we afraid to forgive? Its my experience that we don't completely understand what it means to forgive. Many think it means that the offender is no longer held accountable. Others think it means to forget. That's not true. What it means to forgive someone is making the decision not to serve up the offense again to  myself or to that person. To no longer hold something in my heart against them doesn't mean it won't cross my mind. It means I won't spend time dwelling on it or thinking of ways to get revenge. I'm certainly not going to spend time discussing it with others if I have forgiven.

Do I have to forgive? Further into the same passage (and yes, its highlighted)  ³⁶ "Therefore be merciful, just as your Father also is merciful. ³⁷ “Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. ³⁸ Give, and it will be given to you: good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom. For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you.” (Luke 6:36-38, New King James Version)

Nine years ago this month, while visiting my cousin, The Princess was taken during a carjacking. I was knocked down by the van door and watched helplessly as my cousin was ran over twice. The sight of her laying motionless on the ground, seeing the van drive off with the back hatch and both side doors open, knowing the entire time that Alli's carseat was unbuckled was nothing less than torture. The trauma brought on by the unthinkable is still part of me. Certain things can still trigger a physical response inside that I can't always explain. So, no, I won't forget what happened that day.

The dilemma to forgive brought me to this question, does forgiving mean he shouldn't be held responsible? It doesn't mean that at all. He broke the law (many actually) and had to pay for his heinous actions. But if I didn't release it in my heart, I would have been the one who actually ended up in my own personal prison. I wasn't willing to do that. If I held onto it, it wouldn't have punished him. It would have only served to torture myself and those around me. There is no benefit to that.

Do you have someone or something you still need to forgive? Are you willing to give it over to the God who has forgiven you?

Always,

Hope

Stepping Into Ministry-Part II

When I speak of ministry I am referring to all Christ followers. We have all been called to minister in some way or another. We are being equipped daily to reach into the lives of others and to bring light into a very dark world. From the day that we commit our lives to Him and become born again (John 3:7b) we are destined to minister. Just like our physical life, as we grow we gain more ability, as we mature we are given more responsibility, our spiritual growth is much the same. We learn lessons both spoken and through experience. As  children, there were many lessons we learn by being told and simply believing our parents, others had to be learned the hard way.

My dear friend has great examples in her four children. Her oldest had to test daily if the limits were still there. The next one just needed to test every so often but found comfort in boundaries. The third was compliant and faced things on an emotional level and the fourth understands on a logical level. We can sit in church, listen to sermons and act on the principles taught. There are many of us who have to "try it out" first. The beauty is that the Lord knows our learning styles. He knew that allowing me to have a birth mark and subsequent scar on my face would give me compassion for children who are teased  far more than a lesson or lecture would have. As a young woman, I knew in my head that infertility would be a sad thing but until I walked that path for years, I couldn't truly be used to comfort a woman as she grieved the loss. If I had been able to give birth to more children, I most likely wouldn't have pursued the adoption of the Princess, who has taught me more about faith and trust than anyone else in my life.

Whatever trial you have faced or are experiencing at this moment, you can be sure that it won't be discarded but be used to make something beautiful. It may be the catalyst to form a deep relationship, minister to a hurting person or spur on someone giving them hope. Be sure that if you submit it to your Creator, you will be given the freedom to be a blessing to others. On this earth we may never know why but in faith and trust, we can allow it to be used to bless the lives of others. Joseph was used to save his people. How will you be used? Will you allow peace to invade your soul?

Always,

Hope

Stepping Into Ministry

This morning in my Life Journal I was led to Matthew 1-4. I was impressed by the fact that before Jesus went into public ministry He was tempted in the wilderness. He had been baptized by John the Baptist, chapter 4 states He was "led by the Spirit to be tempted by the devil" and after a time of fasting and when He rejected the temptations, it says (v11) " Then the devil left Him, and behold, angels came and ministered to Him." At this point, His earthly ministry begins.
So many of us feel ready for ministry when in our human wisdom we have gone through the steps laid out for us. We feel we have proved ourselves. I have seen many who are discouraged because a pastor hasn't appointed them or they haven't been hired to a position that they are certain they qualify. I myself have been baffled by being overlooked to teach a particular study. Jesus wasn't discouraged or baffled. No one was, has ever been or will ever be as qualified to teach as Jesus was yet He was still tested. Why should we be different?
In our preparation for ministry, we need to remember that everyday holds opportunity to reach into the lives or others. If we are focusing on the One we want to bring to others, He will bring people to us who need Him. He will allow us to confront temptation (with His protection of course), be tested and permitted to grow in areas we didn't know still needed development.
Our current sermon series has been focused on Joseph's life and ministry which can be found in Genesis 37-45. What has stood out to me the most is that Joseph knew early on that the Lord had called him to minister to His people. There had to be some moments where Joseph wondered if God hadn't passed the word on to those who seemed to derail the plans. Instead, Joseph trusted the Lord, continuing to serve Him and wait for the time He would be used. In hindsight we are able to see how Joseph was put in a position to save his people during the famine.
Where are you in your journey? Are you trusting that God has your destiny in His hands? Do you question at times whether or not those around recognize God's plan in your life?
Tomorrow I will get more personal and share some of my journey towards my destiny. Stay tuned...

Always,

Hope