One Size Fits All?

As long as I live I will never forget the look on Serena's face when she lifted the hanger off of a rack during a trip to the garments district. After reading the tag "One size fits all" she let out a loud "HA! That's a lie from the garment industry!"
Serena had been fighting the battle of weight loss her entire life. She was an inpatient at an eating disorders clinic and was on a group outing when she happened across some clothing that she had hoped would be a good find. It wasn't a fit, she would move on to the next rack.
I am noticing that this same misconception has permeated other areas of our society besides just clothing (which by the way has changed the term to "one size fits most"). Our schools, churches and public places still focus on fitting the majority, forgetting that we have many who by being able to fit in a bit more would benefit all of us in one way or another. The mistake many make is believing that only the majority matters and that leaves those in the minority from being able to truly make the mark they are intended to make.

There is a family in the Pacific Northwest who have recognized the need to have a place for their daughter to play. The local news has even covered their story in several broadcasts and news articles. They are making great strides in getting the word out on funding this project. I am excited for what this means for them, for Harper but most of all for their community.
The Princess was born with the same genetic disorder as Harper so I know what challenges this can bring. I also know what being around her means as well. I know that getting comfortable with someone who is different takes actually spending time around them. Being in the same classes, sharing the same space and interacting on a regular basis will bring familiarity and comfort so much that maybe my daughter won't be referred to as "kids like her", "the girl in the purple wheelchair" or "special needs" children. They will be called by their name and remembered for a laugh or an indomitable spirit.
When my daughter becomes just as important as other children at school, Sunday school or vacation bible school (instead of an afterthought), then our teachers and other students will begin to be more accepting of those with differences. The tolerance we speak of will be more than just words but actions. The act of wiping a child's drool will be no less of a chore than helping one draw a photo or learn a new skill. Pushing their chair won't be any more daunting than leading another child to the art center.
In Matthew 25:35-45 it tells us: "...inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me." Who doesn't want to be a blessing to the Saviour? You can bet that if we were gathering at church and Jesus walked in, there would be a crowd around him begging to give Him a drink, sit next to Him for potluck and make sure He was comfortable. Do we do this with others? With our homeless, our mentally ill, those that dress differently or those with disabilities? If we do this with our "least", we are blessing our God. If we don't He says He never knew us. If we greet only those we are comfortable with, we miss the blessing as well.
So I will agree with Serena, on this one, one size does not fit all. We need to allow for accommodations for those who would be happy to be included. Not just physical needs but emotional and spiritual needs as well. We need to look around when we are including everyone and see if we are truly mean everyone. 

Always,

Hope

As a sidenote: There are churches (like the one we attend now), schools and communities (like Harper's) that are working towards these goals, I just want to make sure we get better at it!

A Day to Honor Fathers

Today was his day. We honored our Coffee Guy by giving him his choice of where to eat and what to do. We have had a lot of fun but it was a time to reflect as well. The church service was dedicated to fathers with the worship dance team sharing "Butterfly Kisses" (with both fathers and mothers dancing with their daughters) and our pastor blessing us as he always does. This time there was special encouragement for the dads. We came home and let him open his gifts. I decided this year the the most fitting gift would be a case to hold the flag that was on his father's casket almost 45 years ago. Its been touched away since his brother gave it to him over ten years ago. It was time to make a place for it.

It is so easy for many of us to take for granted that our fathers will always be there for us. Even knowing what I know, I have to be reminded that this isn't the case for everyone. Recently I mentioned that we have begun studying our genealogy. It has been on our minds more than it has been in the past. As we enter stages of life with our children that the Coffee Guy never had with his father, there seems to be time to reflect on what might have been different had he actually grown up with his father in his life. We will never know but we are both know that God's heart is to bless the fatherless.

In our case, for the last 20 something years, my father has stepped in to my husband's life to be father. As a Dad, he didn't have a role model growing up but has a role model now with experience and hindsight. He could have lamented his situation but instead he has chosen to draw on the wisdom of others. One of our favorite verses is found in Isaiah 43:19 "See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland."

If a day like Father's Day is a difficult one for you, keep seeking the Lord for healing. If this is a day of great joy, please remember those who find this day harder than others. At Prayers of Hope there was a reminder last year to pray for fathers who wouldn't be getting a construction paper tie or a finger painted picture. Those same fathers would welcome the prayers this year as well.

As we wrap up another Father's Day and head into Summer, count your blessings, seek a life of joy and remember to say the things you need to say to the fathers you know around you.

Always,

Hope

Rain, Clouds and Dreary Seasons

There is no eloquent way to say it, the weather this year is strange. Its mid June and we haven't hit 80 once. Yes, I live in the Pacific Northwest, yes it rains here but trust me, not this much at this time of year. We even live in a section that is sometimes referred to as the banana belt of the Northwest but you wouldn't know it if you just showed up in the past few weeks. It has been cold, wet and stormy for a long time. In the past I have written about how I welcome clouds into my life. I really do, in moderation enjoy storms, rain and even a cold day, but in moderation. Always in moderation. This year it seems as if the time for moderation has past. We all seem to be waiting for the clouds to pass and the warmth to once again brighten our days.
As I was thinking about this today, a thought struck me. We all have times and seasons in our lives that are more dreary than others. Some seasons of life have literal and figurative storms that come crashing in and pass. Others seem to just hang around like a never ending winter. Some last days, some years and some decades. So in the lives of those who seem to have never ending storms, getting through is a matter of finding the hope that (as my Mom always said) "This too shall pass".
So how have I faced this very long dull season? On my better days I continue to hope that the Summer will eventually come. We will gather for "Music on the Half Shell", we will cruise in "Graffiti Night", ride our bikes, attend the county fair and visit the Happiest Place on Earth before the school year returns. I also surround myself with those who lift my spirits. Family and dear friends (some new, some who have weathered many seasons with us) walk along side me through the gray days. They add color and add contrast to my life. They make me laugh, smile, dream and they give hope.
Jesus Christ does that in my spiritual life. When it gets dark for a long time, when the pain of loss chills me through, I turn to Him. The only one who can really walk me through, giving me hope for a brighter day and a warmer season. That is the only hope I can bring to those who are living in the darkest, longest winters of their lives. Like the song says, "Sometimes He calms the storms, sometimes He calms His child." In that I have hope.


Always,
Hope

I Now Have A New Title

I am now a "Parent of a High School Graduate". Something that many of us take for granted but I am keenly aware that not everyone achieves this milestone. For us it was this past Sunday. I had the wonderful privilege of sitting with family and friends in the wind, rain and hail to watch my daughter walk across the stage to get her diploma holder (getting the diploma came right after in the gymnasium) with tears in my eyes and feeling my breath catch in my throat. I was one of those moments that you knew was coming but had no clue really how it was going to hit you but then it happened. They read her name. The name we prayed over for months after finding out we were expecting. The name that means "Lamb" and "Follower of Christ". Our sections erupted in cheers and as soon as she crossed, posed for a couple of photos and made it to her seat, I glanced over at her exceptionally proud Dad to exchange a loving glance that proclaimed "we made it"!

With her Grandfather beaming next to me, the next goal was to patiently wait until the last few names were read so we could make it through the crowd of people and find her. I just wanted to hold her again so I could whisper to her how very proud we are of her accomplishments. It really was a big day!

We finally found her, adorned her with her special lei

and caught her beautiful smile.

Posed for some pics.

Watched her hug friends.

Took her home to see her sister,

and to pose with a very proud Grandfather.

We enjoyed a small gathering with family and close friends. We ate home made cupcakes and counted our blessings. Everyone spoke of how fast it went by (not the ceremony but her life) and how we need to remember to always take in every day. The question of "what's next" kept coming up. She spoke of community college or perhaps art school. We all winked knowing that her future also includes a certain "Tech Guy" that has been here a lot over the past year. For me, her nearest future will include cleaning out her room before a TV crew shows up to film their next episode and possibly taking a few days of down time at somewhere relaxing.

I would love to be eloquent or poetic about the life of a mom and the ever changing job description but frankly, I am exhausted. I am just going to sit with my mug of steaming coffee so I can take it all in. The sun is beaming in at the moment, the world seems peaceful and there is a sense of accomplishment in knowing that perfection doesn't hold a candle to doing your best and learning along the way. My job isn't over, its just changing like everything else in this unpredictable world and I am so blessed to be here!

Always,

Hope

An Open Letter to My Daughter Upon Her High School Graduation

To My Ray of Sunshine,

Your arrival into this world was no accident. You were prayed and hoped for longer than seems possible. At the news of your impending arrival, the joy we felt was beyond comprehension. We began praying at that time that you would be blessed with health both spiritually and physically, also that the Lord would guide us in raising you.
Your life so far has been more than we could have hoped or dreamed. Your beauty comes from deep within and you are a joy to all who really know you. You are filled with creativity, compassion and common sense.
From the first day you stepped into Mrs. McDill’s Kindergarten until now, school has been a mixed bag of joy, sorrow, frustration and friendships for you (believe me, we have felt it too!). It is so strange that your Senior year is coming to a close (probably not too soon for you but beyond fast for me). The middle has been filled with hundreds of beautiful memories along with sad and tragic ones. Through it all, you have handled so many more things with grace than I would have at your age. I can’t help but be overwhelmed with gratitude for how you have turned out and being allowed to have a front row seat to it all.
At this time, so many people have asked me (and I am sure you) about what is next. So many of those who ask, really don’t know you too well or they would realize, I certainly don’t have that answer. I am in no big hurry for you to find the next big thing, but will do my best to enjoy every little thing that comes our way over the next few days, weeks and months.
Just know this, you are deeply loved! Not only does your family love you but the Creator of the Universe loves you deeply. He only wants what is best for you. The difference between His love and ours is that He will never fail you. We will continue to try our best to be supportive, to help guide and to show love, but we will fail and so will you. None of that will negate who you are and who we are to you but if we use it as a stepping stone instead of a stumbling block, we will come out ahead and rise above the things that make us fall.
Thank you for allowing me to be my weepy, sappy ball-of-Mom-self lately. Most of all, thank you for letting me be such a significant part of your life even after walking you to class on the first day of school.
Love, Mom




Always,


Hope