December 29, 2009

Parenting Your Parents

Mom called it "the Sandwich Generation". Parenting your children at the same time you are taking care of your parents. In reality, I don't have to take care of my Dad. He is still very capable of taking care of himself. I guess I am just protective.
Today he is traveling back to his home. His flight has already been delayed over an hour causing him to miss his connection. I found myself speaking to the airlines, calling siblings near his home who will be picking him up and keeping constant contact with my husband who has to wait away from the gate to make sure Dad gets out of town okay. All of this and when I texted Dad, he assured me that he was taking care of it and that he would be ok. He already had gate agents working on a solution to keep him from waiting five plus hours at the connecting airport.
What I need to remind myself is that it was only last year that he was still taking care of my Mom. Sure, she was living in an assisted facility but anyone who has a family member with special needs of any sort knows, there is still constant care involved. There are always calls to make, supplies to purchase, appointments to keep and decisions to make.
So just like we need to do while parenting our children, pause, pray and release. Hold on to only what is necessary, step in only when truly needed and trust that the Lord is in control especially when I am not. Most of all, I need to continue to let him be the parent. Nobody really wants to be hovered over especially after 60 years of independence.
So when would you step in? Just what cue would you look for in this case?




Always,
Hope

2 comments:

Q.' said...

I love your stories. :) Thanks for the headsup about where to find you.

My mom turned 77 this week. She is very independent and I'm not one to hover...I respect her space. But I have 3 sisters who hover long distance....and I am certain that if mom needs something THEY will let me know. :)

Praying for you as you sort it all out. Blessings to you! Q.'

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